Traveling Solo While in a Relationship: Tips from Solo Travelers

Sharing is caring!

A week after I went on my first date with my now-husband, I left for a five-week trip to Europe. He knew right away that travel wasn’t just a hobby, it was a big part of my life.

While I didn’t take many solo trips when we were dating or early in our marriage, that changed when I switched jobs and suddenly had a much more flexible schedule. He still had a 9-to-5, and I was faced with a choice. I could travel alone, or stay home and wait.

My first completely solo trip was a road trip through Shenandoah National Park. I car camped at the campgrounds, spent my days hiking, and realized how much I loved the freedom and independence that came with road tripping alone.

But I know this kind of travel can bring up all sorts of feelings. As women, we’re often made to feel guilty or selfish for wanting time to ourselves, especially when it means leaving our partner at home.

Prioritizing your own hobbies and sense of adventure isn’t wrong. Solo travel can be one of the most empowering things you do, and in many ways, it can enhance your relationship at home.

Let’s Normalize Traveling Solo While in a Relationship

I didn’t realize traveling solo while you were married was weird until people started asking me, “But where’s your husband? Why doesn’t he go with you?”

At first, I laughed it off but after hearing it so many times, I started to wonder if what I was doing really was unusual.

I think what many people don’t realize is solo travel doesn’t really have anything to do with your partner—it has more to do with yourself. I’ve become a completely different person since I started taking solo trips.

I’m more confident, able to problem-solve better, and all around happier since I get to take advantage of my flexible work schedule.

There’s nothing “bad” about you wanting to travel without your partner.

Why Solo Travel Still Matters

One of the biggest reasons I love solo travel is the personal growth that comes with it. When I took my first solo international trip, I rented a car and road tripped through England and Scotland.

Those first two days were rough—I was an anxious wreck figuring out intersections, driving on the other side of the road, and especially navigating all on my own. But by the end of those two weeks, I was a pro. Road tripping alone is one of my favorite ways to solo travel after all!

I can’t even put into words how much confidence that trip gave me. It reminded me that I’m capable of handling hard things, even when they feel overwhelming at first.

It also gives you time to fully explore your own interests. Maybe your partner doesn’t love hiking or museums or wandering around antique shops—but you do.

Traveling alone means you get to follow your own rhythm and make decisions based on what you want, without compromise. I also love that you can change your mind on a whim and there’s no one there to complain or consult with.

Finally, solo travel builds trust and communication in a relationship. It challenges you to talk openly about expectations and boundaries, and it reinforces that a strong relationship doesn’t mean doing everything together.

Tips for Taking a Solo Trip While in a Relationship

Managing Guilt and Perceived Judgement

I don’t know about you, but this is one of the hardest parts for me. When I tell people that I’m taking a trip without my husband, I feel like they are judging me so hard, even if that’s not actually the case.

I check in with my husband once every few months to see if he’s still okay with how often I’m traveling. I travel a lot and can be gone up to two weeks out of the month, so you may not need to check in as often as I do.

I’m very lucky that my husband is incredibly supportive and encourages me to travel as often as I can because he knows I love it (and it’s my job!).

Remember that it’s YOUR relationship. As long as you and your partner are happy with how things are going, no one else’s opinion matters.

I try to make things as easy as possible on him before I leave for a trip. So I try to clean the house, go grocery shopping, and sometimes make a casserole he can eat for leftovers, and ask him if there’s anything I can help him with before leaving.

Communication is Key

As you can see, communication is a huge part of managing solo travel while in a long-term relationship. Before leaving, I tell him when he can expect to hear from me.

Sometimes I travel to places where I may not have good cell service or I am going on a work trip which means I will be busy from sunup to sundown. I warn him in advance that he may not hear from me for a few days in between texts/calls.

When I’m gone for long periods, like when I travel for 4 – 5 weeks at a time, I make sure to FaceTime him at least once per week, call once a week, and send a text at least every day.

My husband isn’t a big texter (or communicator in general, really) and every person’s needs are different so talk to your partner about how often they would like to hear from you.

If solo travel is a new thing for you and your partner to navigate, you may want to share why it’s important to you if they are a little nervous about you leaving.

Share Your Plan

I used to be a type-A planner, but since I’ve started traveling so often, I’ve become more of a fly by the seat of my pants type person. Even so, when I’m going on a solo trip, I always share where I’m staying and my general plan for the itinerary.

When I was road tripping through England and Scotland, sometimes I was planning things out a few days ahead. I shared a Google spreadsheet with my husband that had my general route planned.

I would update it with links to where I was staying once I booked the places and used it to plan out things to do each day. It was a nice way that he could keep up with all my updates in real time and I didn’t have to resend documents every time I made a change.

One of the biggest concerns around solo travel is about safety. Sharing your itinerary and checking in often with your partner are two of the best ways to alleviate those concerns.

Dealing with Loneliness

I feel like this hits completely differently after you’ve been in a long-term relationship for a while. You’re so used to sharing experiences with your person, so it can be tough when they aren’t there.

Before my UK road trip, my husband and I did a cruise to Norway out of London. We were vacationing together for about a week and a half when he flew back to the US.

I was almost in tears in the airport when he was leaving which is SO unlike me. But I was used to traveling with him at that point and I didn’t want him to go! I had been traveling solo on and off for the last four years at this point, so it’s not like I wasn’t used to it.

So just know that you aren’t alone if you experience this. Even seasoned solo travelers can feel this way sometimes. Here’s how I try to combat loneliness on the road:

Book a day tour. I’ve met some really nice people on group tours, plus if the tour is themed, you’ll likely run into people with similar interests. I love food tours because people who love to eat are my kind of people.

Another option is to go on a multi-day group tour instead of traveling completely solo.

Stay in hostels. This one isn’t for everyone. Trust me, I stayed in hostels in York, the Isle of Skye, and Edinburgh in the UK and had very different experiences at each. But the common areas really are great places to meet other travelers.

Some hostels will also host nightly events. The one I stayed at in Edinburgh hosted a pub crawl, karaoke, dancing nights, and more.

Do something you really love. If I’m struggling with my feelings, I love a good comfort food meal, so I typically decide to go out and treat myself. If you love taking a hike, touring a museum, or anything else, try doing that and see if it will cheer you up.

If all else fails, I FaceTime my husband, family, or a friend! A little pep talk goes a long way.

I’ve also found that these feelings don’t really come up for me on shorter trips (4 – 5 days). I only deal with loneliness creeping in when I’m traveling for multiple weeks alone.

Plan Intentional Time Together

When I’m home, I like to plan intentional time with my husband where we spend quality time together. This also helps cut down on feelings of guilt associated with leaving.

This shows that while I love traveling, I also want to prioritize our relationship and time that we get to spend together.

It also helps that both of our love languages are “acts of service” and “quality time.” So it may help you to figure out what your and your partner’s love languages are to make sure you are showing your love in the right ways for them.

Incorporate Trips with Your Partner

This is really important if your partner also loves to travel. Make sure you’re planning a few trips with your partner so you both have things to look forward to.

My husband’s job prevents us from traveling together as much as we would like, but we still take weekend trips together relatively often and do at least one or two big trips together per year.

What Other Women Are Saying

I run the Facebook Group Married Women Traveling Solo and asked the ladies in there why they travel solo and if they could share some of their best tips. This is what they had to say.

“Why I travel solo despite being happily married? I’ve found I truly enjoy the freedom of solo traveling, which allows me to move at my own pace, be self-reliant, and connect more deeply with the cultures and communities I visit.

I do also enjoy traveling with my husband when his schedule allows, and with my kids. Having a mix of solo and non-solo travel creates the best balance for me.

Tip: The thing that causes my husband stress when I travel is concern for my safety. Staying connected and ensuring he knows my itinerary day by day is important.

While I don’t check in every minute of the day, he has access to track my iPhone.  I try to let him know when I expect to be out of cell range, send regular text updates with photos to him and my kids, and make sure to check in frequently in the evenings.” – Sonia of Careyon Travels

“Even though I’ve been with my husband for ten years and we love traveling together, I really value my solo travel time. I feel that solo travel taught me to be independent and self-sufficient in a way that I had never experienced before.

I try to do a couple things to make it easier for my partner when I am gone. First, I will make sure all my normal weekend chores are done, since I normally travel on weekends. This way, he isn’t having to pick up too much extra slack when I am gone.

Next, I try to make sure anything that I can’t get done, I do my best to manage or outsource (order grocery delivery instead of shopping or make sure the dog is booked for daycare so that all he has to do is drop off). 

Part of the reason I travel solo so much is that I have a more flexible job and more reasonable work schedule than he does and so I don’t want to make his life even more stressful when I leave.

I think a lot of women don’t travel solo because they do or manage all of the household labor and so when they leave, their partners resent them for “dumping their responsibilities”.

While I feel that my husband and I have a much more egalitarian approach to our household, I still want to make sure that there’s no resentment when I’m not there to handle my half.” – Tory of My Trails are Many & Tory Talks Trails

“Whenever I’m traveling without my husband, we always talk about our expectations regarding communicating while I’m gone.

This does depend on the place I’m traveling to (will there be good phone service and/or wifi, the time zone, etc) but generally, we talk about how often we want to touch base.

At a minimum, I’ll keep him in the loop on bigger travel days (flights, long drives) so that he knows I arrived safely, but I do try to touch base at least once a day if I’m able.

I also try to schedule at least 1-2 video chats so I can see my son and have a more face-to-face conversation with him and my husband.

Before deciding where I’m going to travel, I check with my husband to see if the location is somewhere he’d be upset if he didn’t get to go.

There are lots of places he couldn’t care less about visiting, but there are also a lot he really wants to experience. I don’t want to visit locations he has his heart set on seeing someday. I try to save those spots for trips together.” – Stefanie of Open Road Odysseys

“Traveling solo gives me the freedom to embrace my adventurous side in ways my boyfriend wouldn’t enjoy.

He’s not a fan of heights, challenging hikes, or even airplane travel, so going solo allows me to chase those adrenaline-filled experiences without compromise.” – Liz of Get Lost in the USA

“I’ve never thought it odd that I still travel solo sometimes even though I’m married. It’s okay to have separate interests from your spouse.

It’s not like you become one melded person that only likes mutual things and spurns anything you don’t both enjoy. If you only ever do things together, what do you talk about at dinner? There’s no stories to share because you were both there for everything. 

I love sharing travel with my partner, but I’d never guilt him into traveling when he’s not interested. What a waste of time and money!

When I go on a solo trip, my spouse also takes that time to do something he enjoys that I don’t. He’s not missing out on anything because he was never interested in the destination in the first place.

Communicating honestly about what type of travel you do and don’t want to share with each other will save you a lot of stress and resentment.” – Rachel of Means to Explore

“My partner and I have very different interests when it comes to travel. For example, one of us likes to spend all day swimming in the sea, whilst the other one prefers visiting museums and going on tours. Therefore, we have had to learn to compromise during our holidays.

One of the benefits of travelling alone is being able to do exactly as you please without having to worry about anyone else’s preferences. I love going on a solo trip and having a bit of me-time!” – Hazel of Hazels Travels

Your Desire to Travel Alone is Valid

If you’ve been considering a solo trip but feeling unsure about how it fits into your relationship, I hope this post gave you the clarity and encouragement you need. When you make space for your own growth and happiness, it strengthens everything else in your life, including your relationship.

So if you’ve been waiting for a sign to plan that solo getaway—this is it. Start small if you need to, but don’t wait around for perfect timing or everyone’s approval. You deserve to do the things that light you up.

And if you want more support from women who get it, come join us in my Facebook group for married women traveling solo. You can ask questions, share trip ideas, and connect with others who are navigating the same journey.